A Brief Chronicle of a T1D Parent and Teacher in a Covid-19 World

While it’s a new day, it’s a groundhog-day version, our daily situation playing out with continual repetition. And, so this is our lives in what my 15-year old son describes as a dream, just not the kind we hope for. On this day, Laura Stebbins is on a treadmill, except this time it’s not the one she prefers for her daily morning run. As a type 1 Mom, Laura has the added challenge and dimension of being a parent and a teacher at a time when the roles are being blurred as schools move exclusively to virtual learning in a Covid-19 world.

As an 11th grade High School English teacher in Gwinnett County, GA, a wife and mother of two boys – 12-year old Luke with T1D (Diagnosed March 2018) and 4-year old, Lincoln – Laura finds herself in the not so enviable position of a woman who is on both sides of the teaching/parenting phenomenon that is upending American households, putting pressure on work and family in ways we have not experienced before.

As a parent of a 12-year old type 1 boy myself, my wife and I have also been thrust into this hybrid world, one moment on a conference call with co-workers, the next helping my son answer questions online from a science video just assigned as homework before his next class. The multitasking and distractions serve as an endless stream of adrenaline and cortisol squirts, impacting our health, sense of self, presence, and focus.

Now, imagine you are on both sides of that equation, parenting and teaching all day long, task shifting, responding to individual questions and needs, creating lesson plans, and yes, even grading papers and preparing the next day’s work. Imagine the day in and day out of that with no clear end in sight, and 16 to 17-year-old students dealing with their own heightened, negative emotions ranging from fear, loss, anxiety, and confusion among such a rapid shift in their worlds.

What makes this whole thing, even more, confounding for Laura and her husband, Lee, is that Luke’s blood sugars have been skyrocketing the past few nights, the only reasonable explanation based on precedent indicating some kind of sickness coming. While usually scary, it’s easy to fear the worst with Covid-19 looming, the invisible enemy in the air and on surfaces, always ready to attack.

We know the every-day challenge of parenting with T1D, and we’re all finding that just being home more doesn’t mean better glucose control of your child, it just means we’re reminded more of how we can be so out of control. It’s in these times that I appreciate Laura, not just because of what she is doing to stay on the treadmill of life right now, but the way she’s leading and showing up for her kids, and I mean all of them, at home and at school.

When I ask her for some perspective in all of this madness, the former actress and singer does not miss a beat. She’s quick to feel for the loss her students feel, the moment they find themselves in now, just a few weeks ago laughing and actually enjoying school and friends has quickly devolved into loss, social isolation, and lack of motivation that accompanies sitting home alone on your computer. How can anyone prepare a kid for all of this? A time where they are still grappling with their own independence and leaning on friends to muscle through all of the teen angst-filled with raging hormones and looming college deadlines. In a moment, that’s all gone with no prospect of getting it back in an uncertain world.

It’s that kind of care you’d expect from a teacher in high school. Aware, empathic, sensitive, and strong. All the qualities it takes to lead self and others are the ones that are also province to type 1 parents who dedicate their days to the battle for their child’s independence and health, a never-ending lifeguard role that comes with its own brand of stress and anxiety.

We’ve seen it time and again of late, individuals who lead and demonstrate that the worst situations can bring out the best in us. We need to find light in the dark and I felt that light in listening to Laura’s story, a story that can be framed as complaint and negativity but never bordered on that. Sure, there was an acknowledgment of great challenge in the change and anxiety, but Laura’s real concern is for the mental health and welfare of her students who will undoubtedly take more personal risks the longer this continues, and of course, for the health and wellbeing of her boys and family.

To that end, Laura’s family approach includes a bit of a ‘Covid schedule’ these days, a way to keep some level of routine in the chaos. After the family dog walk, the kids play together while Laura finds her way to the treadmill of her choice, her ongoing and daily ritual to stay healthy, mentally acute, and to manage her anxiety. On the treadmill of life these days, these 45 minutes are just about the only time Laura has for herself to refuel and serve so many people in need. Ironically, it’s the machine she uses especially at times when she feels her life is like one. And, if there was ever a time for a regular and vigorous run, now is it.

Andrew Deutscher is a parent of a type 1 child and the author of typecast: Amazing People Overcoming the Chronic Disease of Type 1 Diabetes. His experience as an international keynote speaker on the topic of integrated wellbeing and performance has enabled him to frame diabetes care in an empowering way. Andrew can be reached at andrew@mytypecast.com